Make Believe Venue: The Post Bar, Fullerton Hotel
Real Venue: The Round Smoking Table, Mr. Prata
Over a cup of Teh O Gajah in a classy huge mug, in the cosy setting of our heartlands, low ceiling rotating fans, amidst an up-market crowd in dressy attire (baju kurongs) and surrounded by fine southern indian dining, concocted by Master Chef Tamiwaring Apron, FC Hobos EXCOs held a meeting to discuss on pertinent and relevant issues, such as club direction, season's targets, possible player expansion, the imminent financial crisis in the States and how its affecting our decision to purchase a new football or otherwise, player positioning and how to get the best of our lads, player morale, avoiding player turnover, and our financial officer Benzema giving a wrap up of our books. That was a friggin long sentence.
We are very happy to declare, that FC Hobo is in a financially strong position to overcome any economic strife, as we are free from sub-prime loans and have the backing of the MAS to further bolster our position as the most well organized, satirical, eye-popping and non typically-boringly-predictable-copycat-ohmygodimyawning club in the league.
In fact, our financial advisors have recommended that this is the perfect time FC Hobo Investment & Securities of Hobo (F.I.S.H.), make a move and strike while the iron is hot. Several clubs have declared themselves to be open for a takeover in a desperate attempt to stay afloat.
F.I.S.H. has already made a formal bid to takeover a sub-conference division club in Fiji, promising their board and their fans a healthy transfer kitty of $26.30 for them to splurge in the off season.
Several transfer targets include former England International Paul Gascoigne, one-time rising star of Man Utd Luke Chadwick, Player turned manager turned player turned manager turned player Matthew Le Tissier and an ambitious attempt to lure Juande Ramos as manager, convincing him that its time he goes somewhere he can't possibly f*!k things up anymore. His assistant, Gustavo Poyet will be signed as the Groundsman.
Now for the Hokkien Phrase of the Day.
“kam lan”
direct translation - ‘to fellate’
real meaning - an expression added into questions to denote something ridiculous or defies logical understanding
eg: “Lu choaa lu eh bor chut lai kam lan aa ??” [translation : “Why the hell do you bring along your wife ??”]
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